What's In Your Mind?

As you think, so you become

Thought Power could be renamed: The 1,001 ways to say "As you think, so you become" ;-), but the author’s insistence on that one idea actually gives me an incredible insight about what to do next, how to progress on the spiritual path. I must say that until now, my general feeling was that I was a pretty accomplished individual, having excelled in the educational system and being somewhat of a good athlete, i.e., in my words, having "mastered the intellectual and the physical". So it never occurred to me that anything additional was needed, that there really was any way to grow further.

What I realize is that, the same way I have learnt to master my intellectual capabilities in school, and my physical capabilities through exercise, something I need to gain control of (because I can see that I have very little control over it!) is… my thoughts! i.e. what is going on in my head all the time, the little voice in my head saying "this sucks", "I am bored", "this guy is an idiot", "I’m a loser", "Is love fading away?", etc, as I move through life. I realize that, indeed, most of the time I have no control over what is going on in my head! Shattering realization!

The Way Things Are

I receive that Buddhist book The Way Things Are and start reading it. What a surprise! It does not feel "religious" at all (from my early memories of Catholicism). On the contrary, it reads like a guide on how to live a more harmonious, more joyous life! Pretty much everything sounds reasonable, and, in fact, it spells out my personal secret wisdom (e.g. "we are all One", what you see is what you are, etc) but goes much further and deeper.

I am quite stunned that what is written in this book resonates so easily with me while I HAVE NEVER HAD ACCESS TO SUCH KNOWLEDGE (despite pretty extensive schooling)!! But it maybe that, if you had told me a year ago to read a Buddhist book, I would have yawned... I start wondering why these kinds of things are not taught in school, or by our parents, and start realizing that there must be a vast expanse of such knowledge already written that I have not accessed yet...

The 3 ways to deal with disturbing emotions

One piece that I really find useful and insightful in The Way Things Are (bullets are mine):

"How to deal with disturbing emotions? Buddha advises a concerted three-step attack on this imaginary but tough enemy.

• First, one should avoid circumstances known to bring about unwanted feelings.
• If that is not possible, one is wise to focus on their impermanent condition and changing nature: as a certain disturbing mental state was not present earlier and will soon be gone again, it would be nonsense to act it out, thus laying the seeds for future trouble.
• The highest level is not giving power to unwanted feelings by "letting the thief come into an empty house". Here, one stays strictly with what is in front of one’s nose and neither acknowledges nor identifies with any disturbance. As this succeeds, one realizes, ever more consciously and with growing amazement and joy, that painful mind-states do not just vanish into nothingness but actually reappear (…) as insights beyond ego."

We are what we think

As I truly enjoyed The Way Things Are, I buy Teachings of the Buddha for another dose of Buddhist wisdom. Buddha seems to concur with Sivananda. He writes:

"We are what we think.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world.
Speak or act with an impure mind
And trouble will follow you
As the wheel follows the ox that draws the cart.

We are what we think.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world.
Speak or act with a pure mind
And happiness will follow you
As your shadow, unshakable."

The work is within yourself and nowhere else

As an astute twist in the dialogue we started a few days ago, Francois recommends that I read Tony Robbins (it shows that he somehow got the hint that I was trying to give him that the work is within oneself and nowhere else). I send him the link to this great interview of Tony Robbins that I found. A few excerpts (Tony speaking):

"Life's greatest rewards are reserved for those who demonstrate a never-ending commitment to act until they achieve. As simplistic as this may sound, it is still the common denominator separating those who live their dreams from those who live in regret."

"Ultimately, the only way to be fulfilled is to constantly grow and to contribute in a meaningful way to other people, to the world. And in order to grow, all of us have to be willing to let go of our fear and let go of who we are, and we've got to set standards and we've got to challenge ourselves. What makes people leaders in life is their willingness to say, "Raise your standard. Demand more from yourself." That's what all leaders of any sort do: They call people to a higher standard. I think that causes people to grow. And we must grow. (…) If you don't feel like you're growing, even if millions of people love you, you've got nothing. (…) You're either growing or dying—there's no in-between."

"Growth does not come from having an intellectual discussion with yourself. Growth only comes when you transform. And you must take that growth and convert that to something meaningful so that the world becomes better, so that the heaven on earth that we were talking about earlier actually becomes a possible reality—and I think it ultimately will. It already is for many people. It's just a matter of making your peer group become humanity instead of your peer group being a small number of people that you have influence over or impact on in your lifetime."

"I believe that ultimately my life is guided, but I also believe that along the way, I have a conscious choice whether to listen to that inner guidance or not. And if I listen to it, then my life turns out very differently than if I don't. And knowing when it's really your inner guidance and when it's your fear speaking is very important."

"When I'm being my spiritual best, I don't know what's happening. It's just coming through me. I put myself in a place. I ask for guidance. I pray and then I trust that it's there and it shows up."

"I believe the ultimate path to enlightenment is the cultivation of gratitude. Because in a state of gratitude, real gratitude, deep spiritual, emotional, physical and definitely soul-level appreciation, there is no fear."

"I think that anything we can do to more thoroughly understand how we function as human beings, what really drives us, and how we can utilize that understanding to be better human beings and better spiritual beings, is definitely a part of our evolution. And I think it has to happen rapidly because our technology is multiplying in its capacity and its strength and its diversity more rapidly than our technology for the management of human emotion, which is what drives all human action. And I think that's the part that has to be focused on. We need to develop the emotional and spiritual muscles to deal with whatever challenges show up."

Tony Robbins

In addition to getting started with meditation, I also actually followed my cousin’s advice and read Tony Robbins’ Awaken the Giant Within, as I know that, in essence, Robbins does the same job as spiritual teachers do: help people know themselves better and grow into their full potential as a human being. I shared this finding with my Buddhist friend Sasha, but he replied that serious meditative practice is the only way to transform oneself. Hmm… Is it? My reply:

"One more word about Robbins: the reason I think it is of interest is that – and maybe it's just me – I believe it is important to fully understand some of the paths towards a joyful and fulfilled life taken by people in our culture – as it can help us communicate more effectively with our peers...

I do believe like you do that a spiritual practice, like some of the things we are exploring, is one of the most powerful tools out there. Robbins doesn't really talk about it – although some of the visualizations he talks about are somewhat comparable to meditation. It is actually funny to see how there is no spiritual thread to what he talks about, yet, without a doubt – Buddhist teachers and Robbins are talking about the same thing.

What Robbins says (about pleasure/pain, energy, beliefs, states of mind, identity, etc) is already a stretch to many (I learnt a lot of good stuff!!) – but his language is understandable to all, while some of the Buddhist/Eastern stuff may sound esoteric to some – I for example already encounter a number of strong, bizarre reactions when I drop the word Buddhist at some friend's gatherings!

I recognize that Tony provides no real tool if you do not commit to his methods (no transcendence aspect) but
- what he talks about IS enlightenment, awakening
- he HAS helped many, undeniably, awaken.
Therefore, he IS a spiritual teacher, one that points to your Self."

After I put the book down (and because I did not, in fact, commit to his methods, while I know he offers workshops, tapes, etc, to practice them), there is, in fact and indeed, not much else remaining in me besides the sweet memory of the high that reading the book created. Practice is the key, I know…

The Way Things Are (2)

I re-read The Way Things Are, the first book I read on Buddhism. I am now able to grasp its meaning much more profoundly than I did back in July last year. It makes me realize that spiritual writings are characterized by several layers of DEPTH, which reveal themselves to you gradually as you progress on the spiritual path... (This starts giving me the idea to re-read the Christian stuff... I suppose I would be able to see that towards which it points now?) Some of my favorite bits:

"Unenlightened beings miss their innate perfection because of basic ignorance. This state may be understood as consisting of four or two veils. In the former case, one distinguishes between basic ignorance, the disturbing feelings arising from it, the clumsy actions which follow, and the unpleasant results and short-sighted habits which propel one into further harm. According to the second view, constantly changing states of mind are one’s first obstacle. (…) The second hindrance is stiff ideas and the narrowing of experience through concepts."

"The finger pointing to the moon is not the moon, and words and ideas are only the shadow of experience."

"Harmful people are more confused than evil and, while a few minutes in their company is trying to others, they have to live with themselves day and night. Hurting them in addition to such suffering would be unsportsmanlike. Instead, it is wise to give any difficult situation lots of space, learn from it for the later benefit of all, and then quickly let it go."

"Seeing beings as attractive and meaningful brings only good, while searching for their faults produces spiritual poverty."

"Information moves slowly from the head to the heart, from thoughts to experience."

"Buddha said: "Don’t believe anything just because a Buddha told you, but check everything for yourselves. See if the teachings fit with your experience and be your own guiding lights"."

"One no longer needs to hope for a good film; one owns the cinema and can play what one wants."

The spiritual significance of human relationships

I just found on the internet a great text on relationships, from spiritual teacher Eva Pierrakos (a WOMAN spiritual teacher – rare encounter!). It corresponds very much to my experience in the last few weeks (waking up from sleepwalking my relationship with Richard). I strongly recommend this read, as well as all other Lectures from Eva Pierrakos.

From that same spiritual organization Pathwork, here is also a map of spiritual growth that I find quite helpful.

Excerpts from The spiritual significance of human relationships:

"Relationship represents the greatest challenge for the individual, for it is only in relationship to others that unresolved problems still existing within the individual psyche are affected and activated."

"The illusion can sometimes be maintained that the problems arise from the other person when one feels disturbance only in his or her presence, and not when by oneself."

"The friction that arises out of relating with others can be a sharp instrument of purification and self-recognition if one is inclined to use it."

"One's contentment and fulfillment in relationship is a much neglected yardstick for one's own development. Relationship with others is a mirror of one's own state and thus a direct help to one's self-purification. Conversely, only by thorough self-honesty and self-facing can relationships be sustained, can feelings expand and contact blossom in long-term relationships. So you can see, my friends, that relationships represent a tremendously important aspect of human growth."

"When people whose spiritual development is on different levels are involved with one another, it is always the more highly developed person who is responsible for the relationship. Specifically, that person is responsible for searching the depths of the interaction which creates any friction and disharmony between the parties."

"The more developed one will always be willing and able to search for his or her own involvement whenever he or she is negatively affected, no matter how blatantly at fault the other one may be. A person of spiritual and emotional immaturity and crudeness will always put the bulk of the blame on the other. All this applies to any kind of relationship: mates, parents and children, friendships, or business contacts."

"If the more highly developed person refuses to undertake the appropriate spiritual duty to assume responsibility for the relationship and look for the core of dissension within, he or she will never really understand the mutual interaction, how one problem affects the other. The relationship must then deteriorate, leaving both parties confused and less able to cope with the self and others. On the other hand, if the spiritually developed person accepts this responsibility, he or she will also help the other in a subtle way. If he or she can desist from the temptation to constantly belabor the obvious sour points of the other and look within, he or she will raise his or her own development considerably and spread peace and joy. The poison of friction will soon be eliminated. It will also become possible to find other partners for a truly mutual growth process."

"When a man and a woman stay together in a more enduring and committed relationship, maintaining and even increasing bliss depends entirely on how the two relate to one another. Are they aware of the direct relationship between enduring pleasure and inner growth? Do they use the inevitable difficulties in the relationship as yardsticks for their own inner difficulties? Do they communicate in the deepest, most truthful, self-revealing way, sharing their inner problems, helping each other, rather than placing mutual guilt on each other and whitewashing themselves? The answers to these questions will determine whether the relationship falters, dissolves, stagnates -- or blossoms."

"Difficulties that arise in a relationship are always signals for something unattended to. They are a loud message for those who can hear it."

"Whenever there is friction or deadness, something must be stuck, something that ought to be seen. Some interaction between the two people remains unclear. If it is understood and brought out into the open, growth will proceed at maximum speed, and, in the dimension of feeling, happiness, bliss, profound experience, and ecstasy will become forever deeper and more beautiful, and life will acquire more meaning."

Tao Te Ching

I discover the Tao Te Ching – one of the most beautiful (and shortest!) spiritual texts ever written. The text is available online here (I recommend Stephen Mitchell's translation, as some other translations do not render the mystical/spiritual nature of this text as well). I love every single word of it, it melts in your mind like pure candy. A taste:

"The master doesn't talk, he acts.
When his work is done,
The people say: "Amazing:
We did it, all by ourselves!""

In the notes at the end of the book, there is this delicious quote from Ramana Maharshi:

"Wanting to reform the world without discovering one’s true self is like trying to cover the world with leather to avoid the pain of walking on stones and thorns. It is much simpler to wear shoes."

The Power of Now

Despite being turned off by the cheesy title, I finally get to read The Power of Now, after a couple of friends have recommended it. What a surprise: it is the best book about "enlightenment"/"higher consciousness" encountered so far. The author Eckhart Tolle does an incredible job at conveying the spiritual message without tying himself to any religious system or tradition. Quite a – o so painfully needed – accomplishment!

I write to a friend: "Nothing written in this book differs from my own experience. I could have written about every sentence of it". A few excerpts:

"There is and always has been one spiritual teaching, although it comes in many forms."

"The word God has become empty of meaning through thousands of years of misuse. By misuse, I mean that people who have never even glimpsed the realm of the sacred, the infinite vastness behind that word, use it with great conviction, as if they knew what they are talking about. Or they argue against it, as if they knew what it is that they are denying."

"Just because you can solve a crossword puzzle or build an atom bomb doesn’t mean that you use your mind. Just as dogs love to chew bones, the mind loves to get its teeth into problems. That’s why it does crossword puzzles and builds atom bombs. You have no interest in either."

"The moment you start watching the thinker, a higher level of consciousness becomes activated. You then begin to realize that there is a vast realm of intelligence beyond thought, that thought is only a tiny aspect of that intelligence. You also realize that all the things that truly matter – beauty, love, creativity, joy, inner peace – arise from beyond the mind. You begin to awaken."

"The predominance of mind is no more than a stage in the evolution of consciousness. We need to go on to the next stage now as a matter of urgency; otherwise, we will be destroyed by the mind, which has grown into a monster."

"The pollution of the planet is only an outward reflection of an inner psychic pollution: millions of unconscious individuals not taking responsibility for their inner peace."

"Anything that is done with negative energy will become contaminated by it and in time give rise to more pain, more unhappiness. Furthermore, any negative inner state is contagious: Unhappiness spreads more easily than a physical disease. Through the law of resonance, it triggers and feeds latent negativity in others, unless they are immune – that is, highly conscious."

"If a fish is born in your aquarium and you call it John, write out a birth certificate, tell him about his family history, and two minutes later it gets eaten by another fish – that’s tragic. But it’s only tragic because you projected a separate self where there was none. You got hold of a fraction of a dynamic process, a molecular dance, and made a separate entity out of it."

""Water? What do you mean by that? I don’t understand it." This is what a fish would say if it had a human mind."

"Don’t get stuck at the level of words. A word is no more than a means to an end. It’s an abstraction. Not unlike a signpost, it points beyond itself. The word honey isn’t honey. You can study and talk about honey for as long as you like, but you won’t really know it until you taste it. After you have tasted it, the word becomes less important to you."

"You find God the moment you realize that you don’t need to seek God."

"The down cycle is absolutely essential for spiritual realization. You must have failed deeply on some level or experienced some deep loss or pain to be drawn to the spiritual dimension."

"The most essential kind of knowledge is not yet widely accessible."

"All evils are the effect of unconsciousness. You can alleviate the effects of unconsciousness, but you cannot eliminate them unless you eliminate their cause. True change happens within, not without."

"As more humans awaken, the word work is going to disappear from our vocabulary, and perhaps a new word will be created to replace it."

"In the state of surrender, you see very clearly what needs to be done, and you take action, doing one thing at a time and focusing on one thing at a time. Learn from nature: See how everything gets accomplished and how the miracle of life unfolds without dissatisfaction or unhappiness. That’s what Jesus said: "Look at the lilies, how they grow; they neither toil nor spin.""

"It is true that only an unconscious person will try to use and manipulate others, but it is equally true that only an unconscious person can be used and manipulated."

"The amazing and incomprehensible fact is not that you can become conscious of God but that you are not conscious of God."

"How much more time do you think you will need before you are able to say "I will create no more pain, no more suffering?" How much more pain do you need before you can make that choice?"

"— How will I know when I have surrendered?
— When you no longer need to ask the question."